An insider view into the challenges of a real, everyday Femdom relationship. A lot of couples in a D/s relationship often find it difficult to maintain a real life Femdom regimen. Do you also find it difficultfrom time to time to stick to your Femdom routine? The pitfalls that normal life creates seem to be everywhere. This article provides tips to solve common challenges. Useful especially for those, who already live their Femdom dreams and sometimes struggle. But also for those who still seek a real life Femdom arrangement with a Mistress of their own.
Challenges of a Real Life Femdom
Very often various distracting influences and events beyond our control enter into your well-meant efforts. Work, fatigue, stress and children enter the equation. This happens even if the woman is a very strict and uncompromising Domina and the man a well trained slave. Especially in cases where both partners want Femdom to be omnipresent in their interactions this might get very frustrating.
Although you both still feel the roles in the relationship, you also have a need to really experience them. Every slave is happy as long as he can serve his Mistress devotedly, look after her comfort. He needs her to experience pleasure. As a proof of his devotion, he endures her cruel treatment, humiliation and undergo punishment at her whim. In the same way, Mistress enjoys his care and utter humility on a regular basis. She does not want to be deprived of the benefits of owning an obedient slave.
Unfortunately, life often puts obstacles in your way. Retaining your ideal Femdom regime is not always possible. Particularly with family problems, work related stress and arrival of children, problems arise. In case of raising a family, Femdom couples are challenged the most. Children obviously cannot understand an atypical relationship pattern such as Femdom. They certainly should not be exposed to kink and that poses many challenges to the Femdom couple.
Set Rules and Follow Through
But how do you ensure that the otherwise wonderful Femdom does not get drowned in the dreary mundane chores and duties? For me, the answer is simple, though the implementation is not so easy. Molière said, “The greater the obstacle, the more glory in overcoming it.” If there is a constant desire and effort present from both partners to enjoy Femdom, it can be done. All you need to do is to set some rules and then always follow them in every possible circumstance. It takes planning, a lot of it, but the fruit of such an effort is a fulfilling, mutually beneficial relationship.
Regular Rituals
Regular rituals are a very important element in making such a regime easier to maintain. These will eventually become a normal part of a Femdom couple’s daily life, and maintain the necessary level of D/s in the relationship.
Of course, these rituals cannot be the same for everyone, as everyone has different options, especially with regard to the time and intimate space where they can be performed. They should be chosen so that they are performed on a truly regular basis, even at times when the circumstances are not very favorable.
The rituals may be various little things. A small gesture can go a long way, because is it signals the willingness of the slave to serve his Mistress permanently, even when he is not in the mood, tired or stressed, he still can put in the effort. His Mistress’s acceptance of them, her willingness to use her husband as a slave even at times like that will prevent prolonged intervals without Femdom that would lead to frustration on both sides.
Ideas for Femdom Rituals
These may be, for example: breakfast in bed, foot massages, oral gratification of Mistress, care for her shoes, permanent marking of the slave as the property of his Mistress, daily small gifts, etc. Depends on what suits Mistress and what she can realistically demand of her slave.
Failure to perform these regular and undemanding tasks is then considered a serious breach of the slave’s duties and should be followed by very severe punishment at the first appropriate opportunity.
Regular Preventive Spankings
Whenever possible, you should include regular preventive punishments. They keep the slave alert so that the Mistress does not have to punish him for his mistakes or lack of respectful behavior at times when the circumstances make this impossible.
In my own experience, it is the regular preventive spankings that keep slave aware throughout the day that he is a slave to his Mistress, thinking of her and behaving accordingly. Every time he sits down, he feels it very intensely that he is owned. My slave gets 25 strokes of the cane before I let him go to work and another 25 strokes when he returns. This keeps him more careful so as not to give Mistress any cause for further punishment. Such a spanking requires no great preparation and the execution, even with preparation, only takes a few minutes.
These rituals should be a permanent part of daily life and it is very important indeed to do them regularly and always make time for them. Preferably regularly at a specific time. If circumstances change, it is advisable, (with agreement and open discussion between both partners), to adjust them to make them realistic.
Monickers and Phrases
There is another very good method, even at times when it is not possible to be fully in your respective Femdom roles. It is to use some sort of slogan to strongly remind the submissive partner that they are behaving inappropriately or not obedient enough. Such a slogan might be, for example, calling a slave by his slave name. For example, my slave name is called the cunt. Not only is it demeaning, which belongs to the slave status. It is also a relatively vulgar word which I do not use under normal circumstances. When I use it, it makes him aware of his totally subordinate position. When he hears it from me other than when his is on duty, it has the same effect as cracking of the whip.
Males Chastity
Another absolutely necessary matter of course is the observance of male chastity. The sexuality of the slave is always controlled by the Mistress. She keeps him in a constant desire to be fully submissive to her. His ever-high horniness then allows her to more easily control him and use him for her convenience. This does not even require the deployment of a CB, if the slave is properly trained.
A proper slave worthy of service to the Mistress is capable of observing the chastity at the command of his Mistress. He then ever violates her command of permanent denial of his own orgasm. However, if the Mistress insists on the deployment of CB and there are no relevant reasons (e.g. work or health) the slave has no choice but to accept it. After all, even he himself knows that if he is always horny, it has a very positive effect on his service and behavior towards his Mistress. After all, serving her well is the most important thing of all for him.
Maintain Your D/s relationship
These tips ought to help you overcome the challenges you will face at some point of your relationship. The presented tips are not very time and space consuming. They work wonders in maintaining the necessary erotic tension in the relationship. You can enjoy them even in moments when it is not possible to perform Femdom with the right setting and atmosphere. When chastity, rituals, slogans are regularly used, the routine helps both. You will more easily attune and seamlessly flow into your mutual D/s roles. You will also better enjoy the full fledged Femdom whenever time allows.
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